It will help you look at your pet dog with empathy, help manage expectations and prevent a single-minded perspective within the dog-human relationship.
All too often, we don’t think outside of our own expectations of our pets and this can result in a relationship fuelled by frustration and a breakdown in communication.
So much of pet’s lives already aligns with our wants and needs- where they sleep, what time they walk or eat and what they eat, even who they have to share their home with. A huge majority of pet companions lack choice in their daily lives and a huge majority of pet guardians don’t understand basic body language or fulfil their pet’s species-specific needs.
A basic definition of empathy is, “the ability to understand and share the feelings of another”. Empathy is the foundation for strengthening the bond between you and your dog. Developing a healthy relationship, requires communication and an understanding of how your pet feels in situations and providing them choice in their day.
It is our responsibility as guardians to help them feel SAFE. This is done through understanding your dog’s emotional responses in situations that they may be experiencing (and are often put into with little to no choice). A healthy relationship is also built on observing THEIR communication through their body language and reading situations or environments from your dog’s perspective.
Ways to understand how your dog feels:
– Become an observer- watch their body language when they’re feeling comfortable and happy- from their ear movements, body, tail and posture, and understand what may make them feel worried or upset.
– Do not use force or punishment- this can escalate worry and increase anxiety and aggression.
– Give your dog the choice to disengage from an interaction if their body language shows that they are uncomfortable or wanting to move away from a situation or interaction – watch for subtle changes in body language.
How to provide your dog with more choice:
– On a walk, allow your dog to stop and sniff and explore with his nose.
– When playing take out a few toy options, see what he chooses and rotate them to keep them fun and exciting.
– Have a variety of sleeping places available for them to choose from.
– Training using positive, force-free methods rather than punishment-based techniques is not only kinder and less likely to cause your dog to become stressed or aggressive, but it also provides your dog with more opportunities to make their own choices.
If you’ve just adopted a new fur companion, there is no need to rush into doing everything with your new dog in the first weeks after adoption. Dogs from shelters often lack life experience or positive associations to these experiences. Most dogs will need time to de-stress, catch up on rest, bond with their new adoptive humans and settle into a new routine. Rushing into everything without tuning into how they may feel sets your dog up to fail repeatedly. Unrealistic expectations don’t build a good foundation and can cause frustration for both parties.
To develop a healthy relationship with your dog, you need to be more in tune with how they feel. Have realistic expectations of what your dog can cope with and SLOWLY build positive associations to what they may feel fearful or anxious about. This is so that you can build a solid foundation of successful learning, confidence and boost your dog’s general happiness. So, start thinking beyond your own expectations and ask yourself, “how does the dog feel”. It’s a simple question that’ll help you build a wonderful relationship with your pet.
